Big boy collected from train station at 10.30pm Friday night. So lovely to see him. AFter work on Saturday boys prepared for Young Farmer's ball and we donned our glad rags for Round Table Area Ball at Kenwick Park. I offered to collect my boys from their event, so that they could have a beer without worrying. At 11pm our boys texted to ask if we were nearly ready. Shortly after another text asking for us to come ASAP. Thought it was a bit funny. Turned out that big boy was absolutely paralytic. Had said 'yes' to every drink he had been bought. He was 'launched' into my car by a group of burly farmers who thought it was absolutely hysterical. He got jammed between the back seat and the front seats. Within one mile he was sick everywhere. He fell out of the car onto the road whilst we tried to clean him up. On arrival at home he couldn't walk at all. He finally collapsed onto the stone kitchen floor at midnight, in an unresponsive, clammy and comatose condition. We rang an ambulance. He was admitted to our local cottage hospital, and made a good recovery by 4am. By this time he was just drunk, not comatose. Frightened me almost to death, and his younger brother, who found it all very distressing. No sleep at all. Sunday we had a big family lunch planned, and I was baking and roasting all morning. Drunkard managed half a plate-ful, disappeared to speak to the great white telephone, returned to the table looking a bit less green, and ate a few more mouthfuls before giving up. His Grandmother thought he looked very peaky and perhaps he wasn't eating well at University? We didn't grass him up, though the temptation was almost irresistable. There are some photos, which I took to be unkind, and to remind him of his condition, but he doesn't want them posted for public entertainment. He is mortified. He has never previously done such a stupid thing, and it has shocked him very much.
AFter lunch his brother drove us all to University to drop off the drunkard, and we made our weary way back home to complete our weekend finally putting our feet up at 8.30pm. Dogs not impressed, particularly as they were not allowed to lick the drunkard whilst he was prostrate, nor were they allowed to greet the ambulance service-men as they deserved.
The vomit, incidentally, covered the entire rear area of my car, a new dinner suit, a new dinner shirt, a blanket I keep in the car, my own ball gown and the kitchen floor. Sadly the drunkard was too unwell to be able to clean it all up himself, and it fell to me to wield the scrubbing brush and the bin bag.
Delighted to be back at work, and beginning to see the funny side, though I am extra-ordinarily grateful to the very kind ambulance men, and the staff at our local cottage hospital. Unbelievably my son was the only A&E customer in the early hours of Sunday morning, and he was treated with far more kindness and consideration than his condition deserved. He thanked everyone, and apologised profusely for the duration of his occupation of a hospital trolley!
Hoping day off tomorrow can be spent relaxing and 'putting it all behind me'.
Big boy has just texted to say he's still far from well. Serves him right. I thank all gods listening that it is a funny story and not a tragedy. The plonker.
3 comments:
This sort of thing would never have happened if you had forced him to have a TV in his room .....
THis is probably true. What rotten parents we have proved to be....he is recovering well, though still washed out and exhausted. Obviously sympathy in short supply, entire extended family think its hilarious .... I'm still struggling to laugh. Your weekend away looks like it was fab - must hear more of B&B.
Glad it turned out well! Except for the part about cleaning the sick up. Eww. Good for you, taking photos! You now have blackmail material.
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